Sunday, April 17, 2011

Wrapped In Light

there were four us there
for what ever reason

This is my mess of an explication. Does it really matter if it makes sense? At this point, does one and one have to equal two? It was a mess. It still is a mess, turning itself from side to side in my mind. And it's a lot. It's a lot of a mess. Never ending, no sight of the beginning or the end. Everything in our lives seemed to have led us to that exact point in time, at that exact location. In the midst of this mess, it was just exactly how our worlds were supposed to be. A complex mess that would turn us upside down, and shake our core.

There were four of us
Five, but only four
Exactly where we were supposed to be
doing exactly what we were supposed to be doing

We could have ran
But we didn't
We could have turned our backs
But we didn't

We all accepted it
Took it into our hands
And then handed it to God
It was all we could do

And that is where the miracle lies
That is where he came in
And that's where we all put on our cloaks
Cloaks of light

If I could take my eyes and give them to you I would. If I could explain these emotions in words, translate it into some replication to show you, I would. But this is unexplainable, worse than goose bumps or chills, more than senses or brain waves, more than neurons. This goes farther than anything of this world. Anything of our world. And should you believe me or not, it doesn't matter to me. My eyes know what I saw. My hands know what I felt. And my soul knows. And that is what matters to me.

There's a web
That God weaves
And all four of us,
we saw that, first hand

We all know
We all believe
We all stood strong
Wrapped in Light

If I could write more, explain more, I would. But words fail. Everything fails. There is nothing that could make you understand what happened two nights ago. Nothing that could give you even the slightest inclination of what we experienced.

There are points in our lives that change us, that mold us, that create us in the image we were supposed to be. Points in the web that God ties knots at. Knots that will change every thing about us. And that was one of them for the four of us. That was one point that we will never forget. No time, no drug, no other memory can erase two nights ago. That will be with us forever. No end. But that is all I can see. That is all I can explain. And we will always hold tight to what we know, what we saw, and what we experienced. Our cloaks will always be in reach.

"Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour." -1 Peter 5:8

"Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." -Isaiah 41:10

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Grasp of Faith

We all go through pain. We all go through sorrow. We all feel lonely, and feel like no one is there to reach out. Why are we, the human race, so stubborn? To place ourselves in our boxes, embarrassed to share what we feel with not even one other person. The ironic thing is, everyone has a person. Someone that God put in their life to help them through chaos and help them up. We all fall, and need help up, and God puts hands there to reach out. So, why do we ignore them? Or more likely, why do we blind our eyes from what God wants us to see? There are little things that can keep us going, small reminders like butterfly kisses from the wind that God places in our paths; yet we ignore them. We focus on the storm that is either brewing, storming, or passing away. We don't turn our eyes to heaven and see past the clouds to the God beyond. We selfishly place ourselves at the center of our world, at the center of our storm and see no one out there. We say no one cares, and feel lonely. And before we know it we're blaming and fighting, when we should confiding. We blind ourselves to the shelter of hands that are there.

These hands, my hands, are here. I am reaching. Thank God for shedding light upon them. But you still have to hold on. I can graze your cheek and stroke your back, but you have hold on tight before I can help you up. I always needed you to need me like I needed you. And it seems now that you always did. But you never let me in. You never let me take your hand. And even with the light reflecting off my open palms, I can only hope that you will take my hands now.

So, will you?

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

To My Father

Thank you
for all that you have done
all that you are doing
and all that you still have to do

Thank you
for being the wisdom in my words
the love behind my actions
and the content feeling that clings to me

Thank you
for calming a raging storm
opening the closed door
and bringing me back to the light

Thank you
for opening his eyes
shaping my life
and sending the million miracles I see everyday


Saturday, April 2, 2011

Give and Take

There is a rise and fall of waves in an ocean. A time to live and a time to die. A time to smile and a time to cry. And like everything, there is a time to let go, move on, walk away from battle. But today is not that day. Our time is not up. Do not falter, or question, or back up. Today is not that day. Nor is tomorrow or the next day. Do not give up. Stop thinking, start feeling. Fall in love with me with all my faults and all our flaws, because we can still be a beautiful mess. Is that not what most of life is? Just fall for me. Please. Because I fell for you, and it will suck if I have to help myself back up.